Week 2

Week 2's in the books gang, hope you had fun! We've got a weekend hiatus from kickball (because of Labor Day weekend), but we'll be back on September 7th for more action! Check out the blog for recaps, humor, rule info, highlights and news on this season!

Don't forget to vote in the "Poll for Theme Week" to decide our theme for October 5th! Details in the blog below and the poll's on the right side of the page, underneath the Slideshow!

Just finding out about this page? Cool, please feel encouraged to participate in making this site better; shoot me your recaps, quotes, nominations or whatever else before each Tuesday evening and it could get featured in the weekly blog (which is typically published every Tuesday night). Don't forget to comment on the blog too!

Recaps:________________________________________________________

SF Natives:
The SFN's whooped up on Team Deathballs handidly this weekend 17-2. They were "pwning" big, red balls left and right. (Did they follow the mercy rule though, nope, gotta knock 'em for that. At least let the DB's lose with dignity next time gang!) It was quite a match to see, with the Natives rolling out a few ringers to terrorize the league this season.

Balls of Glory:
There's a league-wide blog? Yep, so send me your recap (thefinalbunt@gmail.com)!

Team Deathballs:
Ummm? We lost I think? Okay, at least send me a recap trying to redeem yourselves! Didn't you guys kick butt in the bar afterwards too?

Team SAAS:
Lost their match to Sleazy this weekend, but should be able to bounce back in their matchup during Week 3.

12 Step Sloshers:
12 Step Sloshers beat the Frisco Donkeys by forfeit yesterday as they were short one girl. We did end up playing them anyway, to prepare ourselves for our match against Morningwood during Week 3, and had a fun time.

Sleazy Bandeezee:
You guys are really dropping the ball. Come on JB, get your act together already!

Frisco Donkeys:
Most of the FD's couldn't turn out for their game this weekend. Sh*t happens, lets hope they can save some face during Week 3. Don't forget to hit up the bar you guys, only 2 members of your team showed up to represent.

Morningwood:
Morningwood won against the Balls of Glory in a scrappy contest that came down to the wire. The final score ended up being 4-3 with the Balls of Glory making a solid run late in the game, and Morningwood conceding on a few errors. Now that Week 2 is over, we're focused on whooping ass in Vegas this Labor Day weekend for the National Kickball Championship. We'll do our best to make Vertigo proud!

Poll For Theme Week:_____________________________________________

We're gonna have a few theme weeks this year and we want your input for one of 'em! The theme week in question is gonna fall on October 5th. We're putting the vote up to all of y'all - so make your voices heard, you've got until this Wednesday, AND THAT'S IT! Here are your 3 choices (the poll is along the right side of this blog):

Rockstar Theme: Everyone goes all out and does themselves up like rockers from the 70's, 80's, 90's or now (like a bald Britney Spears, Kiss, Devo, the Beatles, etc.)

Halloween Theme: Each team dresses up according to a theme they pic. For instance if Morningwood chose "the Smurfs" everyone would sport blue facepaint, white caps and trousers. Make it interesting, your whole team could do Thriller, or Disney characters, whatever.

Superhero Theme: Dress up like Batman, Robin, Superman, Spidey, the Hulk or maybe an anti-hero such as the Joker, Dr. Doom, etc.

Seventh Inning Stretch:___________________________________________

Last week I laid down the Do's and Don'ts of kickballing (you can peep that by going scrolling down to "older posts" at the bottom of this page), and this week I'm gonna drop 2 different kings of knowledge on your collective asses. Numero Uno; how we're gonna help to make the world a better place during this season of kickball, and Numero Deuce; knowing if AND when you've reached All-Star Kickball Celebrity Status.

First things first; I bet a lot of you have no clue that we're actually going to raise money to benefit a charity this season, huh!? Well, its TRUE! That's right my fellow ballers, we're kicking ass for the kids. Well, actually we'll probably be drinking our asses off for the the kids (oh, you'll see). The actual charitable event is still being planned out by our super-awesome social chairs, and we're currently reaching out to the charity to smooth over the donation. However, when more details get ironed out, I'll lay down on all the info so you crazy kids are aware and ready to participate!

Secondly; ever wonder what it takes to be a kickball all-star or do you want to know when you're reached those great heights!? Well, below I listed the top 20 exerts and exploits from the few and the proud kickball rock stars from this season and seasons past. You should use these top 20 as guidelines, so that you too can achieve celebrity status among the league! Grab a seat boys and girls, this is sure to entertain...

20) You know you're a gamer when you show up late to your first monday on the job hungover from the first official week of kickball the day before.
19) You know you're an all-star when you invite a co-worker to play on your kickball team, then when you find out that person stinks at flip cup, you force them to practice at work all week with water so they improve before the next game.
18) You know its about time to sit the next few rounds out when you makeout with another member of your league, in plain view of EVERYONE in the bar.
17) You know you're life needs more meaning when people start calling you the "Michael Phelps of Flip Cup" and don't even know your first name, or what team you play for.
16) You know your a sucker for the sport when your week consists of 3 different games/leagues of kickball, and you're currently trying to sort out how or when you can fit another game in. You may also even organize impormptu tournaments among teams from different leagues.
15) You know you're either watching too many Rocky movies, or you're an all-star in the making when you force your teammates to train in order to be the best in the league.
14) You ought to know you're walking the razors edge when you (or your team) buys matching custom made team socks.
13) Although you will never admit to it, you and your teammates ended up creating a team cheer just to combat Morningwood's.
12) Boomboxes, 80's mixes, team mascots? All of these are signs that you're becoming a kickball convert.
11) Nicknames, we all have 'em, but you have yours stenciled across your team t-shirt, and thereafter decide to always be called by that name, even at your day job.
10) People don't fear you when you're up to kick and/or field, they just hate you! However, when you're at the bar, and at the league parties those same people are your best friends.
9) When you wake up on Monday morning in a stranger's bedroom, call in sick to work, and try to avoid any conversations with this person (because you forgot their first name), then yeah, you've definitely reached all-star status.
8) You know you're a baller when kickball is the cause and solution to all of your weekly drama. It also occupies your entire social life and/or social circle, and you eventually can no longer relate to anyone not affiliated with WAKA.
7) You have passed out keeled over the toilet at the bar, been carried out to a cab, and found yourself asleep on your bedroom floor 'round midnight with about a million text messages/phone calls asking if you're okay.
6) Your Sunday consists of waking up around 1PM, playing kickball, then flip cup and passing out on your bed w/o taking your clothes off.
5) Each time you hang out with people at the bar, you have to re-introduce yourself to them because the first time you all met you were both inhebriated. Just like you both are during said re-introduction.
4) To you, playing kickball with a beer in your hand is not a choice, its a privilege. You also think bunting is for sissy girls and little fairy boys. You can often be seen cursing yourself for getting tagged out, and/or arguing with any and all of the referees.
3) You may or may not have been involved in a shouting match that got you placed in a team imposed timeout during a rousing game of flip cup. There might also have been some pushing involved, depends on who you ask...
2) At the end of the season you've made out with 2-3 people in the league, blacked out once, publicly embarassed yourself twice (at the bar crawl and end of season party), earned a derogatory nickname from opposing players, and have more pictures in the web albums than Scott Biezad has of himself.
1) You know you've basically reached the epoch of "awesomeness" when you go all out at the bar after kickball, get a cab home, pass out drunk per the usual, then wake up in the hallway outside your apartment wearing nothing but your underwear. You thereafter attempt to scramble in the side window of your place, only to be foiled and to have to bang on your apartment door hoping your roommate will hear you. Once the door is opened however, some strange person tells you that you're trying to break into the wrong apartment (keep in mind you're still in your underwear), and you've now got to scramble into the right apartment, one floor below the one you found yourself on.
0) Yes "zero" because its not a tale or exploit that's being listed. Rather, you read this list and realized more than 2-3 of these stories pertained to you directly. If that's the case, don't sweat it! That simply means that in life, as well as in kickball, you're pretty much what those in the know call "the sh*t!"

Got any other quality stories to share about kickballers, personal or otherwise? Post 'em in the comments section (no names please, unless its your own)!

Photo(s) of the Week:_____________________________________________


The SF Natives.


Team Deathballs posing with everyone's favorite can collector.


JELLO SHOTS!

Pointless Predicitions:____________________________________________

1) Public displays of affection are legendary when beer, babes, dudes, and competitive rivalries are spawned (its kinda like the Romeo & Juliet scenario of our times) in another week you can expect a few more of those to go down.
2) 12 Step Sloshers vs Morningwood, the battle for the best of Vertigo commences on September 7th!
3) The SF Natives racked up a lot of points this past weekend, my vote says they pull off another impressive win against the Frisco Donkeys.
4) Team SAAS shows some class with a full squad and quality whopping of team Deathballs. Team SAAS even ends up wining a few rounds of flip cup at the bar thereafter.
5) Morningwood continues to trounce all their opposition at flip cup, care to prove me wrong?
6) Balls of Glory actually have a few members show up to the bar, and prove to the rest of the league they came to play.
7) Frisco Donkeys manage to have 3 team members show up to the bar during week 3 to up their tally from 2 this past weekend. Expect that number to go up each Sunday in relation to whichever week of kickball we're at (i.e. Week 5 = 5 members, and so on).

Ridiculous Photo(s) of the Week:____________________________________


MURDER BALLLL! Our league pres trying to take someone's head off.


News flash, I ruin kodak moments!


OMFG that lady has a SERIOUS drinking problem!


Hey, high five buddy! Oh crap, you're really tall...

Players of the Week:______________________________________________

Captains submit your players of the week to thefinalbunt@gmail.com!

Leia Hawley: Hailing from Team SAAS is one of our players of the week. Leia hauled in a pop fly, during SAAS's matchup against Sleazy, and was able to hold on to it whilst getting laid out by her own teammate Josh. Although her catch still only counts for one out, I think its safe to say she definitely took one for AND FROM the team on that play!

The SF Natives nominate Doug Harrington as their player of the week. Doug had a pair of grand slams as well as some sweet catches playing deep short stop. Their captain Michelle said, "In short, he kicked ass and has been quit an addition to the team and league."

Quotes of the Week:______________________________________________

Submit quotes you overheard this weekend to thefinalbunt@gmail.com!

Quick Kicks:____________________________________________________

1) No kickball over Labor Day weekend, play resumes September 7th. Bring your A-game and be ready to go all out at the bar afterwards!
2) Alpha Bar this Wednesday, August 27th, starting round 7:30PM. Come hang with fellow kickballers at Zeitgeist!
3) Good luck to the teams heading to the National Kickball Championship out in Vegas over Labor Day!

Week 1

Hello and welcome people... For those of us that struggled through a kickball hiatus, welcome back! And to think, you almost kicked the habit. Go ahead and jump back on the wagon, or off the wagon... I gotta say, its good to see your smiling, drunken faces again!

As for you new guys and gals, I hope you had a great first official day of kickball (and flip cup) and are looking forward to more awesomeness as we kick into high gear this season! There's a lot to look forward to, believe me!

Also, real quick, something everyone needs to do for this season to go down right is show up for their games on time. Captains you are directly responsible. Make sure your team shows up Sunday on time (or early) by sending out reminder e-mails each week... Thanks! Now, onto the first official Final Bunt of the season!

RECAPS!

Get 'em while their hot! As a change of pace I want YOU (the Captains of each team) to get together and send me your recaps on how your team did each week against the competition! I'm taking anything you give me and slapping it on the blog-o-sphere for the world to see! That's right the WHOLE FREAGGIN' WORLD! I may have to edit it down if you're a social Sally and drone on for 3 pages, or just spellcheck it if you never learned how to read and write properly, but for the most part it'll be all you! Keep it interesting, keep it humorous, and keep it coming all season long!

For example here's what the SF Natives submitted:

SF Natives
We're off to a superior start this season tying Sleazy Bandeezee 2 to 2. With the combination of last season's finest returning and the addition of some new kickball superstars, the SF Natives may be the team to keep on eye on this season! Jesse from our team was awesome this weekend at catcher and didn't let Sleazy Bandeezee's pathetic bunts get any recognition.

So shoot me yo' recaps BEFORE Tuesday night each week, and keep that up throughout the season! Send 'em to thefinalbunt@gmail.com.

Poll for Theme Week

Yo dudes and dudettes listen here; we're gonna have a few theme weeks this year and we want your input for one of 'em! The theme week in question is gonna fall on October 5th. We're putting the vote up to all of y'all - so make your voices heard, you've got until next Wednesday, AND THAT'S IT! Here are your 3 choices (the poll is along the right side of this blog):

Rockstar Theme: Everyone goes all out and does themselves up like rockers from the 70's, 80's, 90's or now (like a bald Britney Spears, Kiss, Devo, the Beatles, etc.)

Halloween Theme: Each team dresses up according to a theme they pic. For instance if Morningwood chose "the Smurfs" everyone would sport blue facepaint, white caps and trousers. Make it interesting, you could whole team could do Thriller, or Disney characters, whatever.

Superhero Theme: Dress up like Batman, Robin, Superman, Spidey, the Hulk or maybe an anti-hero such as the Joker, Dr. Doom, etc.

You can find the poll along the right side of this webpage, between The Ref's Corner and News From The Social Chair both important sections to check out each and every week for news on what's hot!

Seventh Inning Stretch

This is where I post relevant or irrelevant commentary each week, and force my will upon the league.

As with last season, I think I ought to give the new recruits a hand in reaching all-star status - OR - at the very least finding out how to get the most outta this season. I will now bequeath unto you all the Do's and Don'ts of kickball!

DO: Show up on time to games.
Rolling in late ain't cool homeslice, if your team doesn't have its whole posse by 15 minutes after the official game time you all forfeit.
DON'T: Forget to wake me up before you go, go...
Let your Captains know ahead of time if you're gonna be MIA or showing up late. At least that way they can figure out how to manage the team that will be on the field that weekend.
DO: Drink before, during or after the games.
Because why would you want to waste a perfectly good Sunday being sober!?
DON'T: Avoid temptations and debauchery.
Friends don't let friends play kindergarten games sober - at least hit up the sponsor bar for a drink.
DO: Say completely un-PC things at unconsciously, inappropriate volumes near and surrounded by kids in the park.
Its their parents’ fault for brining them to GG Park on a Sunday. Now Timmy can get a leg up on his peers, at least when it comes to Sex Ed.
DON'T: Take things so seriously!
Life’s one crazy, mixed-up bag of tricks, relax, have fun and indulge in stupidity from time to time!
DO: Play flip cup at our super-awesome sponsor bar, Blackthorn Tavern!
Cause A) they freaggin love us there 2) What better way to bond with your fellow Vertigo players than by trading insults and beating 'em in flip cup (and kickball) @) We're going to have a HUGE Vertigo league-wide Flip Cup Tourney this season, and $) I never learned how to read...
DON'T: Skip out on post-kickball shenanigans.
4 out of 5 doctors agree 90% of the time people have twice the fun when they lower their inhibitions (i.e. drink). You booze, YOU WIN! And the bonus is you don't even have to drink to have a good time at the bar. So join in on the fun, that's my perscription/addiction!
DO: Ridiculously awesome to slightly innapropriate things that get caught on camera.
TMZ's in the house y'all. That's right we got our own brand of paparazzi, and each week we wanna catch you at your best! So don't be shy, let your hair down and have fun. You might even get featured in the blog and reach all-star status for the whole season!
DON'T: Be camera shy.
We've only got a few official camera peeps, so if you keep ducking 'em you'll never have any pics to prove you were there!
DO: Dress up for our THEME DAYS!
This season we're going to have 2 or more theme weekends. If your team goes all out then you all can win yourselves some free booze at the bar! Trust me (as a 2 time past winner) its worth it!
DON'T: Make up lame excuses to not dress up.
You do realize you paid $75 to play a kids game every Sunday this fall, right!? Are you really gonna bail out on a great opporunity to relive days from your youth, and score free booze (which you used to kill for when you were underage)!?
DO: Come out for our Bar Crawls, Parties, and Happy Hours!
Keep your eyes peeled for some awesome social opportunities coming your way this season (care of our social chairs, Alpha Bar, and awesome people in general)! Its gonna be off the heezy!
DON'T: Bail on some of the biggest events of the year!
Seriously, who does that!? What are you, anti-fun!?
DO: Read, submit to and comment on the blogs!
I do this for you people! You complete me. You... Complete ME! SHOW ME THE MONEY!
DON'T: Get offended!
From time to time I will poke fun at other teams, at their expense. This is only to either motivate them to NOT forfeit their games and to prevent them from getting inflated egos. There is no pro-kickball league after all.
DO: Take public transit, or avoid driving.
There's no greater buzz kill then hunting for a parking space all day long. If you do drive, get to GG Park early, cause spots are almost non-existent near the field. Your best bet is to bus, tram, trolley, bike, beg, barter or crawl to the field.
DON'T: Drink and drive!
Someone will and can drive you home, get you a cab, or let you sleep on their floor. Do yourself a favor, avoid endangering yourself and others! I'm effing serious!
DO: Shower me with gifts!
Because bribery pays people! You want your name in lights, and I want free food... Make me an offer.
DON'T: Expect me to come to your every beck and call.
There's only one of me to go around ladies... I will try to help you out with stuff whenever I can though.
DO: Show some love to our league officers and board members!
I'll point 'em out to you in the "Quick Kicks" section!
DON'T: Argue with the refs!
We've got some rocking referees and umpires this season. Whatever they see and say on the field goes amigos! RESPECT THEIR AUTHORITEEEEHH!
DO: Attempt to reach all-star status this season!
Wait, you don't know what all-star status is? Well, next week I'll regale you with some tales of fellow all-stars, so that you'll know, if and when you are one in the future (or currently)!
DON'T: Take yourself or the game too seriously!
Okay I sort of mention this twice, its because its pretty important (not as important as getting home in one piece however)... Nonetheless if you act like a jackass nobody will like you. So have fun, get some smack talk in there, but keep your cool daddy-o!

Now that you read the Do's and Don'ts I expect ALL of you to be ready to rock next Sunday!

Photo of the Week!

Each week we'll have a few photos from our historians to post here. They're typically tasteful, and feature more than a few members of WAKA having a good time and reppin' the league in style.


Team SAAS striking a group pose on the field. Don't they look fierce in their day-glo pink t-shirts!?

Members of Morningwood hogging up all the flip cup action at the bar. Stay tuned, because we're going to have league-wide flip cup tournament this season!

Pointless Predictions

Here's where I enter in predictions, some are on point, others are obviously not. I'm all about keeping it interesting though, try to avoid taking offense - or don't, whatever.

1) I like to think rivalries are more often born in the bar, then on the field. Regardless, this week's 12 Step Sloshers vs Frisco Donkeys matchup looks intense. If the FD's have all their members in attendance, this game could def. come down to the wire.
2) Team SAAS (Socially Awkward All-Stars) takes on Sleazy Bandeezee in what should be an epic, and ridiculous matchup. Expect A LOT of trash talking to fly back and forth.
3) Scott Biezad manages to get 5 or more awful, I mean amazing, photos of Lindsay Mayfield when she least expects it.
4) SF Natives try to take down big blue (in this case Morningwood) at flip cup and burn out faster than Eddie Murphy's music career.
5) Tom Lanahan, after reading this blog's Players of the Week section, won't be able to fit through most normal sized doorways due to an over-inflated ego.

Ridiculous Photo of the Week

Here's where all the best tacky, tasteless, shameful, disgusting, drunken, obnoxious photos get displayed each week. So for all you people with "reputations" to uphold, do not, I repeat DO NOT think for a second you can get away with being utterly ridiculous and avoiding having your photo featured here. We've got a few more historians this year, and they've been advised to capture anything outlandish going down. So with that said, I encourage EVERYONE to go all out and keep us all entertained throughout the season!


One of our Head Refs, and dynomite kickballers Logan caught off guard.

Turn those frowns upside down! There's no crying in kickball!

Don't choke!

Obviously some people thought that our league Historians were their personal camera crew!

That's the most interesting post-kickball headwear I've ever seen, and yet, surprisingly everyone was pretty okay with that. Michael Phelps inspired perhaps?

Players of the Week

Each week team captains will select a few peeps that really went all out at the bar or on the field for their team, or the teams they played against. Many will be nominated but only few will be featured (tops 3) each week. So players, dive for that foul ball, nail that cup on one try, or hammer that homer outta the park. Whatever you need to do, to get your captains, or the other team's captains to notice you!

TOM LANAHAN: Yes the "blond bomber" ladies and gents, the self-titled "Michael Phelps of Flip Cup." I witnessed this kid take on 7 opposing players at flip cup single handidly this past Sunday, and win out cleanly! Inconceiveable! I kinda wish I knew what that word meant... But anyway, props to Tom! And hey, if you think you can do better, then feel free to challenge him!

Here's SF Natives team member Robert Ray's interpretation of the events leading up to Tom's incredible feat (Also, everyone feel free to put Tom down when you see him, so he doesn't get a HUGE EGO): "Sunday Flip Cup started out with mixed teams since everyone is still getting acquainted; the games start with 2 cups a piece, up and back. Then it moves to 2 cups going on down the line. Eventually, it is time to separate the men from the champs and the Survivor gauntlet is thrown down. Sully, at this time, decides that it has now turned into a an 'everyone against Morningwood' type of event... And the challenge was accepted.

The opposing team was a mishmash of Sleazy, SAAS, Natives, and a few others. The game was fairly even for the first few rounds with each team trimming the fat a bit. It came down to about 12 v 12, and that is when Morningwood started to pull away. Long story short is that it eventually got down to Tom (from Sleazy) and two Natives against 7 Moringwood players. We promptly lose 2 more times, so it is Tom vs the 7. He lines up 7 cups, and proceeds to crush them. 6 cups against their 6, same story... and so it goes all the way down to 1 v 1 against the dreaded Sarah O... they stare each other down knowing that it should be a close match. They tap cups, and tom slams the beer and flips the cup getting it settled just a fraction of a second before, securing the most improbable of victories. People were patting him on the back, cheering, and calling him the 'Michael Phelps of Flip Cup.' Yes, Tom definitely had his moment in the sun (even if it was overcast)."

The UMPIRES AND REFEREES of Vertigo! Those guys and gals made some great calls this past Sunday. All the games were run pretty well, thanks for helping us to make our first official weekend such a success!

DAVID ZETZER: Of the 12-Step Sloshers for stepping it up as pitcher and providing his entourage and opponents with a bevy of jellow shots these past 2 weeks! That's what we call a team player!

Quotes of the Week

We're gonna feature whatever ridiculous things come up in conversation each Sunday. Anyone can submit what they overheard at the bar, on the field, said in conversation, etc. Try to keep it kickball relative, or just really ridiculous. I'll sort through your submissions and throw the best few up here each week. Send in your quotes to thefinalbunt@gmail.com. Thanks.

Quick Kicks

This is where we list important things for people to remember, like bar crawls, themes, lost-n-found items, area events, etc. Keep your eyes peeled for what's hot, important and happening in the realm of kickball and San Francisco (because we own this town)

1) Teams check out the schedule for this week and get to the field early so we can start on time!
2) Head to Blackthorn Tavern afterwards for some more good times after the games this weekend!
3) Outside Lands Festival is this weekend, getting to the field will be tough if you're driving, keep that in mind!
4) Check out this season's board members (note: sometimes you gotta click the link more than once to get to the right picture, Picasa can't hang with our stuff)!

President: Matt "I AM MORNINGWOOD" Sullivan
V.P. & Newsletter: Charles "IN CHARGE" Lantz
WAKA REP: Tom "ICEMAN" Lanahan
Head Refs: Logan "THEODORE" Presnell and Will "S. PRESTON, ESQ." Guerin
Social Chairs: Carly "PARTY LIASON" Mangel, Emily "KAMIKAZE" Karp,
June "FLABONGO" Mangers
Historians: Marcus "SNOOP DOG" Ronaldi, Scott "MR. CLEAN" Biezad,
Michaela "DANGER" Doriss

Fall Season

COMO ESTAN BEETCHES!? The time has come to add more kickballs back into your life (or to introduce you to it)!

Head to Little Rec Field in golden gate on Sunday, August 10th and sport your team colors! There's gonna be a BBQ, and beer, and bums, and kickball, and friends, and plenty-o-fun... So why don't you join in on that action already!

Show up to the field at 1:45PM SHARP to cash in on the festivities. There's a gmap link to the right of this post in case you need directions.

See ya there!